Something to think about or even laugh about

[annie]

After a two year long study, the National Science Foundation announced the following results on corporate America's recreation preferences.

1. The sport of choice for unemployed or incarcerated people is: Basketball.

2. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is: Bowling.

3. The sport of choice for front line workers is: Football.

4. The sport of choice for supervisors is: Baseball.

5. The sport of choice for middle management is: Tennis.

6. The sport of choice for corporate officers is: Golf.

Conclusion: The higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller the balls are.

[annie]

John invited his mother over for dinner. During the meal, his mother couldn't help noticing how beautiful John's roommate was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between John and his roommate, and this only made her more curious.

Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between John and the roommate than met the eye. Reading his mom's thoughts, John volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Julie and I are just roommates."

About a week later, Julie came to John and said, "Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the beautiful silver gravy ladle. You don't suppose she took it, do you?" John said, "Well, I doubt it, but I'll write her a letter just to be sure."

So he sat down and wrote "Dear Mother, I'm not saying you did take a gravy ladle from my house, and I'm not saying you did not take a gravy ladle. But the fact remains that one has been missing ever since you were here for dinner."

Several days later, John received a letter from his mother which read: "Dear Son, I'm not saying that you do sleep with Julie, and I'm not saying that you do not sleep with Julie. But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her own bed, she would have found the gravy ladle by now. Love, Mom."

Lesson of the day... Don't Lie To Your Mother.

[annie]

Einstein dies and goes to heaven. Saint Peter says, "You look like Einstein, but you have no idea the lengths some people will go to, to sneak in. Can you prove who you really are?" Einstein ponders for a few seconds and asks, "Could I have a blackboard and some chalk?"
Saint Peter snaps his fingers and a blackboard and chalk instantly appear. Einstein proceeds to describe with arcane mathematics and symbols his theory of relativity. Saint Peter is suitably impressed. "You really are Einstein! Welcome to Heaven!"

The next to arrive is Picasso. Once again Saint Peter asks for his credentials. Picasso asks, "Mind if I use that blackboard and chalk?" Saint Peter says, "Go ahead." Picasso erases Einstein's equations and sketches a truly stunning mural with just a few strokes of chalk. Saint Peter claps. "Surely you are the great artist you claim to be! Come on in!"

Then Saint Peter looks up and sees George W. Bush. Saint Peter scratches his head and says, "Einstein and Picasso both managed to prove their identity. How can you prove yours?" George W looks bewildered and says, "Who are Einstein and Picasso?" Saint Peter sighs, "Come on in, George."

[annie]

AHAHAHHAHHAHHAHA...OMG!!! that's funny...

Conclusion: The higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller the balls are.

I like the last one best...George Bush...LOL...

[annie]

anniekournikova said:

AHAHAHHAHHAHHAHA...OMG!!! that's funny...

Conclusion: The higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller the balls are.

I like the last one best...George Bush...LOL...

I LOVE that one LOL

[Teresa]

LMAO Annie
Those are great
Love the one about the higher up the corporate structure you are the smaller the balls!!!
Also the one about GW is sooooo apt
And......yes one should never lie to their mother
they also know when you are lying, that's for sure.

[lau]

I don´t know if this is the correct thread. But it´s too funny ;D ;D. I had to post it...

French TV journalists go to wrong German city

HALLE, Germany, June 10 (Reuters) - A team of French television journalists had a shock when they arrived in the German city of Halle this week to cover the Gerry Weber Open tennis tournament -- they had got the wrong Halle.

Instead of travelling to the much smaller western German town of Halle in North Rhine-Westphalia, the France 2 team turned up in Halle in the eastern German state of Saxony-Anhalt, some 350-km away.

French Open champion Rafael Nadal of Spain, who the journalists were looking to follow, had already been knocked out of the tournament by the time they made it to the right place.

Tournament spokesman Frank Hofen said it was not the first time such a mix-up had occurred in the 13-year history of the Halle event. Even players had made the same mistake.

"It's happened several times over the years," he said. "Once some colleagues from Poland drove to Halle in eastern Germany, searched around for the stadium but obviously they couldn't find anything there."

[Teresa]

That's funny..........now I can understand players who have never played Halle but tv journo from France now that is funny...........

[annie]

pffffttt...LOL...that's funny!!

[Madou]

Gosh all of these stories are really fun ^_^
But Frenchies look stupid

[annie]

LOL lau....I tell you what hapenned to me last year.

I was going on a business trip to the Sultanate of Oman and I phoned some people at work who take care of the plane tickets and asked them to book tickets for Oman for me and gave them the dates.

So they called back and confirmed, gave me the flight details and stuff. So I call the Russian Embassy in Oman and tell them I am coming and ask them to pick me up at the airport and gave them the flight details.

15 min later they call me back and tell me there are no flights like that to Oman and they have no idea what I am talking about.

Soooooo I called the tickets guys again and they repeated what they said before and told me they'd get me the tickets later that day so that I can see for myself....

A few hours later I got the tickets.....to AMMAN which is in Jordan ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[pau]

lol Annie!!!
Thanks for all guys!!! they're all great. ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

[annie]

This is actually a forwarded email message..but i thought it was really nice so i wanted to share it with all of you...

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, "What does love mean?"

The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined. See what you think:

1. "When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore.

So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love."

Rebecca- age 8

2. "When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different.

You just know that your name is safe in their mouth."

Billy - age 4

3. "Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other."

Karl - age 5

4. "Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs."

Chrissy - age 6

5. "Love is what makes you smile when you're tired."

Terri - age 4

6. "Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK."

Danny - age 7

7. "Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more.
My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss"

Emily - age 8

9. "Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen."

Bobby - age 7 (Wow!)

10. "If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate,"

Nikka - age 6
(we need a few million more Nikka's on this planet)

11. "Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday."

Noelle - age 7

12. "Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well."

Tommy - age 6

13. "Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken."

Elaine-age 5

14. "Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford."

Chris - age 7

15. "Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day."

Mary Ann - age 4

16. "I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones."

Lauren - age 4

17. "When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you." (what an image)

Karen - age 7

18. "Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn't think it's gross."

Mark - age 6

19. "You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget."

Jessica - age 8

20. And the final one -- Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once talked about a contest he was asked to judge.

The purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child.

The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife.

Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there.

When h is Mother asked what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said,

"Nothing, I just helped him cry"

[annie]

Oh I got it the other day too annie, it's really sweet

[Karen]

Something to think about:

Maratchi's foal is due within 72 hours, probably. Maratchi the stud and Winsome Bay is the mare.
I'm now on barn alert, let's hope the veternarian arrives in time, or I have to deliver this horse.

Karen the mid-wife * runs around in circles *

Blankets, towels, and hot water. No idea what the hot water is for, I saw it on TV, lmao.

Name suggestions anyone?

I'll post pics when the foal arrives. Lord, help me